AskOJ.com
By Disco Stu - Editor in
Chief : Issue 4, Vol. II
A
History Lesson
It's been apparent for a while now that O.J.
Simpson is the second wheel on the unicycle of
society. After his acquittal from murder charges,
losing a civil case, and somehow being granted
custody to his children, O.J. went on to play
golf and, um... golf, yeah. Anyway, my point is
he hasn't done anything productive since he was
in the spotlight. Fortunately for the rest of
society, he hasn't killed anyone either. I guess
he stopped after he almost got caught. Ever since
being found innocent he's apparently been on a
"crusade" to find the *ahem* killer or
killers. The fight has led him nowhere, however,
maybe because he's running the
investigation.
Late this summer,
The Juice launched his very own web site, AskOJ.com, to disspell any rumors and doubts
about his past. Upon reviewing the site, I found
it tried to focus more on his football career in
order to turn attention away from his killing
career. Indeed, AskOJ.com is a pathetic and
disgusting attempt at clearing his name.
First
Impressions
The site greets you with a header image of OJ and
a little blurb on the picture describing the
purpose of the site: "OJ, one of the
greatest football players to ever play the game
and also centered in one of the most profound
trials of American Legal History...you have
questions and he's ready to answer them."
The very fact that it even mentions his football
career is indicative of the way OJ wants to focus
attention away from the murders. It's not gonna
work--he's already remembered more for the trial
than his Heisman Trophy and Hall of Fame Career.
Shockingly, the
maintainers of the site have the gall to ask for
a $9.95 membership payment. With a membership,
you have access to "evidence that wasn't
heard in the trial" and could take part in
an exclusive chat with OJ. What did OJ say in the
chat? He basically said "I'm innocent. Don't
hate me, or I'll kill you." Wait... scratch
that last part. Also, you can read his thoughts
on Mark Fuhrman.
 Gimme Money
The site also offers several methods for OJ to
rake in some dough by means of "The Juice
Shop." Other than the membership fees, he
offers autographs ("Can you sign this bloody
knife? Make it out to Nicole, please.") and
a reward for finding the so-called killers of
Nicole Brown and Ron Goldman. The site says
"Entertainment Network Inc., the developer
of the AskOj.com Website, has announced a $100,000
reward for information that leads to the arrest
and conviction of the killer or killers of Nicole
Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman." *Sniff*
Keep fighting the good fight OJ!
So, I'm guessing
if OJ turns himself in he thinks he'll get $100,000.
Are You
Ready for Some Murder, I Mean, Football?!
AskOJ.com, as I said, tries to focus on OJ's
football career rather than the trial and the
murders. In a small "Did You Know?"
section, the site outlines some facts about OJ's
football career that many people may not know.
Read below for some of the Did You Knows found on
the site:
Did You Know?
-
That OJ was
awarded the Heisman Trophy in 1968?
-
That OJ was
the NFL's leading rusher in 1972?
-
That in 1973,
OJ was the first player ever to rush over
2000 yards in a single season?
-
That OJ was
named to the Pro Football Hall of Fame in
1985?
-
That he
murdered two people in cold blood?
All accurate stuff,
as far as I'm concerned. So what was the point of
this article?
Kill OJ Simpson.
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