Home > Site > Back Issues > Issue 5, Vol. 2

 Today:

SITE

Home

Archived Articles

Archived Posts

Issues

Staff

Jobs

Terms of Use

FEATURES

News

Entertainment

Sports

Chicks

Ten to One
Off the Cuff

Signs of Apocalypse

How To
This Week

Editorials

INTERACT

View My Guestbook
Sign My Guestbook

Archived Polls

Link To Us

Monkey Nuns Mail

Contact

Issue 5, Vol. 2

Issue Info:

Date Released: Sunday, January 7, 2001

Cover Story: Britney Spears and Y2K's Top 10 Newsmakers

Featured News Story: Santa Quits

Writers: Disco Stu (Editor in Chief), Sideshow Rob (Senior Editor), Duffman (Associate Editor)

View Cover

Articles

Santa Claus Gives Up
By Disco Stu | News
The jolly, fat guy in the red suit has called it quits just in time for Christmas. He cites "too many friggin' Christian kids" as a source for his retirement.

People of the Year
By Disco Stu | Entertainment
Now that the year 2000 is winding down, it's time for Renegade Monkey Nuns to look at the people of the year. Some of these people aren't exactly the biggest newsmakers (go to the Ten to One section for that article), but they appear in this article purely--almost--for their talents and artistic merits.

Balls Galore! Sports in 2000
By Sideshow Rob | Sports
Believe it or not, lots of stuff happened in the sports world this year other than Tiger Woods. Senior Editor Sideshow Rob calculates the odds of leading a team to the superbowl, the number of planets A-Rod received after signing his contract, and how many people actually get Dennis Miller's ramblings in Monday Night Football.

The Top Ten Newsmakers of Y2K
By Disco Stu | Ten to One
Ricky Martin, Louie Anderson and Big Brother have one thing in common: they don't make Renegade Monkey Nuns' list of Top Newsmakers of the Year. The year 2000 was clearly an eventful year in the news: this list, however, looks at the entertainers, athletes, events, and materials that made headlines throughout the year. Go through the list and try to figure out the year's biggest newsmaker. Yeah, the article seems a bit predictable, but I couldn't resist. Just read.

The Millennium
By Disco Stu | Off the Cuff
The New Millennium begins when the clock strikes 12:00 on December 31st. Find out what he plans to do for the next thousand years.

Our New President
By Disco Stu | Signs of the Apocalypse
Strange things have gone on in the past few months: stocks have been skidding, the weather has acted weird, the XFL is getting ready to launch... But, nothing was as screwed up as the Florida recount business. After all was said done, George Walker Bush was named our new president. Boy, are we screwed.

Santa Claus
By Disco Stu | How To
Lots of people this Christmas season will choose to give back to others by dressing up in a red suit and pretending they're Santa Claus. Disco Stu shows you how to take it one step further by actually living the life of da Claus. Everything from getting elves and delivering toys is covered step by step.

E D I T O R I A L. C O L U M N S
Monkeys With Typewriters
Things We Can do Without in the Next Year
Issue 5, Vol. II
Even though this year was pretty good in terms of, well, not sucking, there are several things that need to go before the next year gets underway. For starters, how about we get rid of pants? Or all clothing in general, for that matter?

»04.22.02

+ Summer Movie Week

In order to gear up for the upcoming summer movie season, Renegade Monkey Nuns is devoting a whole week to movie articles. It should be fun, so make sure to check in with the daily updates!

»03.15.02

+ Staff Page Completed

The Staff Page has been completed by all writers.  Check it out.

»03.15.02

+ New Archived Posts Link

An Archived Posts section has been created, so if you want to look at past posts on the front page go there (I decided I had to make one to prevent the front page from taking forever to load).

»03.07.02

+ Job Openings

There's still room for more writers!  Go to the jobs section for more info.

Ten to One

Other Movies to See This Summer

By Disco Stu : 04.26.02

Though these movies don't quite make out most anticipated movies list, they still warrant some attention. Check these out, because some of these movies could be sleeper hits.

Entertainment

Best. Movie. Ever.

By Disco Stu : 04.26.02

Here's an article complimenting our worst movie list. These are our favorite movies of all time.

Ten to One

The 10 Most Anticipated Movies of the Summer

By Disco Stu : 04.22.02

As part of Summer Movie Week, Disco Stu does some research and previews the 10 most highly anticipated movies of the summer. These are the films that many movie fans cannot wait to see. Will these movies be blockbusters or duds? Find out here.

Jesus Thanks Rappers, Other Jews in Honorary Oscar Award Speech

By Disco Stu : 04.22.02

He's just giving it up to Biggie, y'all.

Congress Passes Law Legalizing Cock-Fighting

By Randal Graves : 03.25.02

It's about time. We've been wanting to whip out our cocks for years now.

Argument About Backstreet Boys and NSYNC Escalates Into Tickle Fight

By Disco Stu : 03.18.02

Oh, like, stop the violence and junk.

AIDS and Cancer to Fight Each Other

By Norm : 03.15.02

God, I hope we don't have any readers who are AIDs or Cancer patients.

How To

Survive a Chat Room

By Disco Stu : 07.31.01

People who regularly go to chat rooms are not normal. But, if you were suddenly forced to go to internet chat rooms (if the government made it mandatory or something), you need to recognize the people who usually go into those things.

Off the Cuff

Mr. T Speaks!

By Disco Stu : 07.23.01

The Man, the Myth, the Legend sits down with Disco Stu to talk about everything from the A-Team, to his stint in the WWF, and even his short career as a rap star.  With sound clips!